Surface Appeal
• General
I’m not one to talk but
America has become a land where in most circumstances very casual clothing is the norm. Overall I think this a fine thing. I’m glad that the day when I might be expected to wear a hat or a tie is long gone.
While I suspect most men do dress up a little bit - by being conspicuously clean and kempt, not necessarily anything fancy - when going on a date or meeting someone.
But a couple of thoughts did occur to me.
Maybe there are guys so clueless as to not make an effort. They may be so lost in their lust that they don’t seriously consider the effect their initial surface impress has on a stranger. Perhaps you should consider wearing a dress shirt instead of jeans or even add a tie. Coordinate colors, wear pants with crisp clean lines. Not to define yourself socially or economically: but to give a visible impression of having made an effort.
Making an effort is showing a desire to please. And if you tend to be tongue-tied the visual cues you provide are even more important.
Naturally it depends on your cultural identification: if you are a punk or goth guy seeking a domme in the same subculture then the details of the strategy may be a bit different.
You might want to ask an impartial female friend to give you a cold and honest evaluation.
Fetish wear, yeah, you think those leather pants are cool. Honestly very few men look good in leather pants.
And you are defining yourself as a person focused on fetish rather than a human being. Who knows maybe even at a fetish venue a pair of khaki pants with good lines and an informal but nice shirt with buttons will make you more distinctive and beguiling.
